Friday, December 30, 2011

Best December Yet and On To The New Year

Good afternoon y'all. It feels good to sit down and write:) Today I'm excited to shed some light on the past month, the fun we spent with Sophie and her Fam for the Holidays, and the exciting future. School is out for another week and a half and I'm taking this time to decompress and get ready for the next semester. And what a semester it will be. But before I get to that I'd like to talk adoption.

Obviously I have strong feelings about adoption. And this past month I have been SO grateful for the blessing it is in my life. I've had the amazing opportunity to speak on panels and at different high schools. And just recently I did a presentation at my very own American Fork High. It was fun to go back and see some familiar faces, but much more, share my story with my younger siblings and their friends in the room. We shared laughs and tears and it was one of the best adoption experiences I've ever had. I've also met some incredible adoptive couples and been introduced to their stories. I can't wait to see where this road takes them and I absolutely love and admire them for their strength. We also shared some good times with the Matheson clan as they spent time in our home for my birthday, and then for Christmas. They are the most beautiful family and I can't even express how much I love and adore every single one of them. Sophie is getting so big. She's talking, and boy does she have spirit. That girl is one spit fire. I tried to convince Troy and Rebecca that nurture was playing a bigger part than nature, but they are sure she's a mini me--completely stubborn and sassy. I can't say I'm sorry though, she needs those attributes in order to survive her fun-loving and adventurous brothers:)

During this holiday season we become centered on gratitude. I am so grateful for Troy and Rebecca. As I watch Sophie grow, and see how much she is loved and cared for I can not help but thank Heavenly Father for the amazing people she has to call Mom and Dad. They are two of the most incredible parents I've ever known. And parenting is hard. No one is perfect. But I want to be like them when I grow up;) My parents and Sophie's parents are the two prime examples of love and sacrifice that I needed to shape my idea of a mature, healthy relationship. I love Sophie with all my heart, and it has been SO MUCH FUN to watch her learn and grow along side her wonderful brothers. And I can't tell you how lucky I am to have the family I have. They are beyond supportive and accepting of my story and the people within it. Sabyn (my younger sister) wants nothing more than to love on Sophie. Unfortunately Sophie pays little mind to anyone, so Sabyn is unable to do so but we're working on it. And Mom and Dad love her and the rest of her clan like the extended family they are. All in all, this holiday season was incredible and I got to spend it with the people I love most.

I could go through every detail of my time spent with the Mathesons but I don't want to sound like a creeper. So I'll just say the boys helped me blow out my candles (naturally:)), Sophie would not let me have my birthday balloons (naturally:)), and my boyfriend met her for the first time...not naturally. It was intense but went very well. I don't expect him to fall in love with her the way I am. And in fact, I've never expected anything, but he has surprised me at every turn with his acceptance and support and desire to become a part of my adoption story. Like I said, best December yet:)

I will post Christmas pictures later, I don't have them ready yet. But anyway, I just wanted to write about the good times. And let the world know that adoption, even with it's hard days, has been one of the best things to ever happen to me.

Now, let's talk New Years Resolutions. I'm not all about the weight loss, or better job, but can I raise a glass for marriage? Yup, you heard it. Wedding talk has been happenin' round here, and holy crap do I already have the jitters! I'm so excited but so nervous too. A few weeks ago I was on the phone with my mom and she asked me, "ShaNae, is there any part of you that feels bad or icky when you think about marrying Spenser?" and I stopped for a second then said, "Honestly, no. The only part of me that says STOP is the part of me that promised she'd never get married before the age of 25." But hey, life never does go according to plan and I've always been known to break the rules. Keeps life interesting:) So, though I don't have a ring on my finger, right now we're working to get some straight answers from the Big Man Himself. Once that happens, a proposal will follow. But wait, wasn't I planning on leaving to Africa for the summer? YUP. Engaged or not, I'm still going. Ya, it's going to be hard, and strange leaving my fiance for four months but I know I'm supposed to go, and next summer, maybe I'll be going as a package deal, I can only hope:) So, a year from now I may be married...that is still hard for me to wrap my head around but I'm excited. Excited to share my life with someone I love. I just hope he can keep up;) and put up with my stubborn attitude. But that's the thing about Spons, and my parents would agree, he is the one person who can. So, all in all, looks like the next four months are going to be action packed. I have school and work, both full time. I have money to raise for my trip to Africa, and I have a wedding to plan....woah. That's quite the load, but I'm excited to get it done. I want a lot in life and I expect a lot out of my future. But I know with strong conviction it can all happen. One of my favorite quotes was actually told to me for the first time by Spenser. It says "If you Want something bad enough to go out and fight for it. To work day and night for it. To give up your time, your peace and sleep for it. And all that you dream and scheme is about it. And life seems useless and worthless without it. And if you gladly sweat for it and fret for it and plan for it. And lose all your terror of the opposition for it. And if you simply go after that thing that you want with all of your capacity, strength and sagacity, faith, hope, and confidence and stern for tenacity. If neither cold, poverty, famish, or sickness, or pain of body and brain can keep you away from that thing that you want. If darker than grim , you besiege and beset it, with the help of God you'll get it." Well, I want to go to Africa and make a difference, then I want to get married and continue a life full of hard work, love, sacrifice, and adventure. And I want that more than anything. So, with God's help, looks like I'm on my way.

Till next time!


  1. So freakin' excited for you! So many new adventures to come. Can't wait to continue to hear about them. You rock!