Thursday, June 6, 2013

Google Search

Okay, so here I have for you some random facts.  As unimportant as they may seem, one can never say that expansion of knowledge is a bad thing.  No matter how useless the facts may be. The other day, during one of my grave shifts, I started to Google anything that popped into my head.  The list below is the direct result of my random googling.  And I have to say, I learned a lot.

Item #1

My Search: Egyptians and Human Organs

My Results: Early Egyptians believed that the heart and other major organs had wills of their own and would move around inside the body.

Okay so the first thing I thought when I read this was, "If that's true, then my heart has some sort of beef with me.  And we best sort this out" But just the idea that organs could be complete entities of their own fascinated me more than it made me laugh at the silliness of the idea.  That's it. Probably the most useless of them all.

Item #2

My Search: Red Head Facts

My Results:  According to Hamburg sex researcher Dr. Werner Habermehl, women with red hair have more sex than women with other hair colors. He also postulates that women in a relationship who dye their hair red may be signaling that they are unhappy and looking for something better.

Well played Dr. Habermehl, well played.  I read this, and looked around my general vicinity, just to make sure no one but me had become privy to this piece of information.  I felt like someone had just given me the nod, confirming my theories to be correct! I'm not saying red heads are promiscuous beings.  Because heaven knows blondes get the rap for that.  But I HAVE always questioned the wannabes.  The ones who dye it red.  Whatcha tryin to say? Whatcha tryin to prove? Why go red? And not blonde like everyone else?  Anyway...

Item #3

My Search: Tattoo History


(you're welcome;))

My Results: The Greeks learned tattooing from the Persians and used tattoos to mark slaves and criminals so they could be identified if they tried to escape. The Romans learned it from the Greeks and would tattoo “fug” on the foreheads of slaves for “fugitive.

It's no secret for those who know me that I think awesome tattoos are AWESOME.  And I say it that way because some tattoos, like the ones with bleeding eye balls and raging dragons, are straight up stupid and disgusting.  No one should ever get those, and the people who do need to be questioned.  So, I was curious, to see how far back tattoos go.  And actually, I also found that one of the earliest mummies ever found had a cross tattoo.  So basically body art has been around since the beginning of time.  As a form of identification.  And this particular fact led me to wonder what kind of identification mark would I choose for myself if we still did this.  Like let's just say if the nerds all got NERD tattooed on their bodies, and all the gamblers got GAMBLER, and all the people unjustifiably on welfare got MONEY MOOCHER, and so on, what would I get? After giving it some thought, I decided I'd get GINGER.  Because as a ginger, most of my key traits and personality quirks are already implied, I wouldn't have to say much more.  

Item #4

My Search: Facts on Love

My Results: When someone looks at a new love, the neural circuits that are usually associated with social judgment are suppressed.


Item #5

My Search: USA tax system

My Results: The United Sates has what is called a progressive tax system, which means that the more money a person makes, the more he or she pays in income tax.

And some act confused...It's quite simple really. What, get a job? Nah,  imma stay home watchin' sum Jerry Springa sippin on my beer and nomin' on a frozen pizza pocket.  That way, those people livin in that there white house aint got nothin on me! 

I totally get it white trash neighbors know what they're doin!

Item #6

My Search: Moral Decline

My Results: Under the Hays Code (1930-1968), people kissing in American films could no longer be horizontal; at least one had to be sitting or standing, not lying down. In addition, all on-screen married couples slept in twin beds...and if kissing on one of the beds occurred, at least one of the spouses had to have a foot on the floor.

Boy have we jumped off the deep end.  How would it have been to grow up in an era with cinematic rules such as this? I'm so used to seeing what I shouldn't during movies.  I think we all are.  And without getting too serious or bringing up a whole other topic of its own, I just have to say it's troubling, and disappointing.  What has been deemed appropriate for the screen has created mass distortions between right and wrong, moral and immoral.  I for one value the sanctity of marriage, the sacredness the union implies.  I'm not a saint, I laugh at crude jokes, I think Easy A is down right hilarious.  But I get sick to my stomach when I realize how numb we are, I am, to the things we see on TV.  Whatever happened to the Hays Code? Maybe I'll google that.

Item #7

My Search: Kissing Facts

My Results: Passionate kissing burns 6.4 calories a minute. A Hershey’s kiss contains 26 calories, which takes five minutes of walking–or about four minutes of kissing–to burn off.

So working out is hard for me, we know that.  I'm a heart patient, my heart sucks, therefore exercise is rough.  I have struggled for YEARS to maintain a healthy weight, because even speed walking makes me nervous.  That being said, you can imagine the little chuckle I enjoyed with myself when I read this.  All this time I've been wearing myself out, when I could have been making out. It's a joke really, but I find it kind of hilarious knowing I will now and forever use this against myself as an excuse not to go kill myself at the gym.  In fact tomorrow night, I'm going to  stay home and make out with my husband instead.  And the best part is, it won't even be a day off, cause i'll be burnin just as many calories. So pleased with this piece of useless knowledge, so very pleased.

Item #8

My Search: Stupid Laws

My Results: 

While reading these laws I couldn't help but come up with some smart aleck remark after each one, they were all just so darn ridiculous. So I picked a few to share.

It is illegal in Tennessee for an atheist to hold office.  And in Tennessee we don't allow gay marriage either, because then we'd be a bit biased and off balance when it came to equal rights, and heaven knows what kind of problems that'd cause...

In Truro, Mississippi, a man must prove himself worthy before getting married by hunting and killing either six blackbirds or three crows. FINALLY. A way to sort the manly men from the rest of them. 

In Kentucky, a woman is forbidden to wear a bathing suit on a highway unless she is armed with a club or is escorted by at least two officers. The amendment says that the provisions of this statue “shall not apply to a female weighing less than 90 pounds or exceeding 200 pounds.” Because heaven knows the teenage boy-lady or the fatty chick aren't getting jumped by a couple hustlers any time soon. 

That's all for today.  I'm in the midst of some research surrounding eating disorders and the facts behind it all.  So, heads up for the next post.  If that topic doesn't interest you, maybe after reading my post it will. Till next time;)

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