Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Attaining the Ultimate Goal

Holy cow, hey world! I realize it's been way too long since I last posted anything. I'm hoping to delve into this blogging thing starting NOW. I want to put my words out there for anybody and everybody and I realize that takes effort a.k.a. constant posts and updates. So, for all you family members and loved ones out there who utilize this blog for the sole purpose of knowing what's up in my personal adoption story, here's a quick little update.

Sophie is 7 and 1/2 moths old!!!!!!! I CAN NOT believe it. Time has flown way way too fast and I wish Soph would stay baby forever:( But it is fun to watch her learn and grow each month, becoming more and more interactive. She still has beautiful strawberry blonde hair, she's super tall and thin, and we think she may end up having green eyes...it's still hard to tell. She loves avocados! She loves her food...what's new. And she grabs anything she can get her hands on. She's very serious and extremely intelligent and all too cute. A few weeks ago, Rebecca and I went to pick her up at a neighbor's house so we could all go out to lunch. We couldn't help but grin and laugh when we walked in to see Sophie being pulled around the house in a toy wagon by the cute little neighbor boy. It would be all to truthful to say that Sophie is so used to being waited on hand and foot that getting a free carriage ride was nothing out of the ordinary;)

On December 18th, Sophie was sealed in the temple and received all the eternal blessings that come with the sealing covenant. It was a day I will never forget, along with the following sunday, when she was blessed by her loving father Troy. At the temple, I had loads of support from friends and family. I was truly blessed to be there and feel of the sweet love our Heavenly Father has for our little Soph. I've heard some birth moms say the sealing day was extremely hard for them, for various reason. I can not say the same. It was the most amazing day of my life thus far and I would do it again and again just to feel the love I felt that day. As I was sitting out in the foyer waiting for the ceremony to convene, a beautiful young lady came up to me and asked me for my name. It took me a few seconds to realize who she was but when I did, my heart became so full of love for this young woman and I was overjoyed to finally meet her face to face. Her name is Erin. She is Sophie's brother Caleb's, birth mom. Having her there, and meeting her for the first time made that day all the more special. We sat and talked until Troy and Rebecca's family gradually made their wait out to the foyer. I hugged each person I could and shared happy tears with many. I was doing pretty good (a.k.a. I wasn't crying too bad) until I saw my own mother walk out. As she made her way over to me, her eyes filled with tears, I braced myself for anything she was about to say. As she hugged me she whispered in my ear, "You did it ShaNae. Job well done. You did it. Mission accomplished." That's when I LOST it. I start bawling and couldn't stop. My heart was so full of joy and peace and comfort that I couldn't help but give myself some credit for making it this far. After all, the sealing was MY NUMBER ONE REASON for choosing adoption. I knew there were angles in the room that day, I felt them, almost as if they were giving me a pat on the back. Now, I am not telling this story to receive divine praise, because all I did was place Sophie with the right family. THEY are the ones I love dearly for taking Sophie and being sealed to her. I could never express to them just how much that means to me.

As it came time for the Matheson's to come out of the temple, Erin and I stood next to each other, arm in arm. It was so wonderful to watch that beautiful family walk out in their temple clothes, with Rebecca holding Sophie in her BEAUTIFUL (thank you grandma Sharon!) white temple dress. All I could do was soak it all in, and hold that beautiful baby girl in my arms, thanking my Heavenly Father for the wonderful blessing she is in my life, and the life of MANY others.

Here are some of the pictures from the sealing day. Sophie is not happy in most of the pictures at the temple due to the hungry tummy she had.


The day of the blessing was so wonderful. My family was invited to attend a breakfast at the Matheson's home before the blessing. We were able to spend time with members from Troy and Rebecca's families, and here are some pictures from that day.



Now, here's a little thing about Troy. He has this extraordinary ability to make me cry. Never in a negative sense though. He is a spiritual giant, and every time he gets serious with me, or about a spiritual topic, I lose it, which was the exact case at the blessing. He gave Sophie a very special blessing and it brought tears to my eyes. After the blessing, Rand, being the extremely adorable, sensitive boy he is, saw my tears and immediately hopped off the bench to get Sophie and bring her back to me, hoping that I would stop crying. It was so darn cute, his thoughtfulness of me, and Caleb's birth mom Erin, never ceases and I just adore him.

I am so grateful to be a part of Sophie's life and to watch her learn and grow. I love her family as if they were my own and I can not stress enough just how much I KNOW I made the RIGHT decision. Sophie is happy, I'm happy, the Mathesons are happy, I see nothing wrong with that.

I'll be posting more soon, about various adoption- related topics, so until next time!

6 comments:

  1. wow. you are such an example. this is the best story for others to read. to see how hard and yet rewarding it can really be.

    thanks for sharing....

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  2. Here is a big ol' understanding hug from Aunt Robin.
    Thank you for sharing Sophie's Story.
    She is soooooo loved.
    And so cute with her brothers! They are all buddies.
    love you

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  3. I just Finished reading your story. Wow, Tears are streaming down my face. Just writing a big teardrop would do it. ShaNae, You are a Rock & A-Mazing. I identify and empathize with most of your feelings. I never had the support you did and I am glad things have changed and you have had this fantastic experience. I love you all. I was lucky and for the short time Michael was adopted I did the best I could to give instructions as to who could be my most blessed beautiful son's parents. LDS Social Services did pick the best, most perfect parents in the world for him. But like you said, we all have different stories, lives and adventures with twists and turns in the road.~
    Love You ShaNae and your Whole family-your parents & the Mathesons for the love and support you have received. MUAH XO

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  4. This is a beautiful post! I am so happy for your daughter and the choice you made for her. What a strong mama! My daughter has two brothers by adoption and I am very curious if I will ever meet either of them one day. I think it would be a wonderful way to affirm our choices for our children's parents and I look forward to that possibility. BTW She is soo beautiful!

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  5. I appreciate all your comments:) They were very loving and sincere. Aunt Robin, I hug you back and I'm so happy you have been able to gain some insight into this story:) it means a lot to me. Chris, thanks again. You have no idea how grateful I am to have your support and the support of many others from Dan's side of the family. Thanks again everyone:) Katie, you and I should chat some time.

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